What a semester!!!

Hello Everybody! Thank you all for working so hard and giving your best effort this semester. I hope Ben and I have inspired you to be better writers finding excitement in the act of putting one's thoughts out in the world. It has been a really good semester, we have seen you improving every week. Thank you all!

Claudia

Baby?

Well, since you asked ... here he is! Little Caleb (full name: Caleb William Darling Lempert) was born Monday (yesterday) morning at 10:47 am. He and Mom are in good shape, although it's 2 am right now and I'm rapidly learning to type with one hand. Here are a few pictures of the little dude from a few hours after he was born. Mostly he just looks pretty spastic(!).

Thank you all for the fun semester ... have a great holiday and please keep in touch!

Baby

Where's the picture of the baby?

Afterthoughts

Thanks for a great class. My writing really did improve a lot.

Where we turn in our paper

Okay I know it's Friday, by 3pm to a mailbox. What was the number though, 7---? And is it in Dwinelle? Thanks.

Paper

So when we turn in the paper, are we also turning in the peer edit sheets and putting it all in a folder like last time, or is it just turning in the paper this time? I know Ben said we don't need to turn in all of our essays, but do we need to turn in the other stuff? I hope this question wasn't already answered :/

Thanks guys.

-Gina

Final essay

I was working on my essay and I looking at a quote in The Lover: "Their disgrace is a matter of course. Both are doomed to discredit because of the kind of body they have, caressed by lovers, kissed by their lips, consigned to the infamy of a pleasure unto death, as they both call it, unto the mysterious death of lovers without love. That's what it's all about: this hankering for death (Duras 90)." I know that this has something to do with the fact that death is associated with detachment and separation. However, I am having trouble analyzing this quote any further. Could anyone help me understand this quote? Thanks.

Essay peer edit

A certain person in my peer review group said he would email his essay to us. I have not received the essay. Please send it again to jeffreyjoh AT berkeley, or you can also bring it over to me in Foothill.

Thanks,
Jeff Joh

A Note on Plagiarism

Dear all,

My department has asked me, given that it's the end of the semester and final papers are coming near, to send out a general announcement about plagiarism. I spoke briefly about this at the beginning of the semester, but to reiterate: plagiarism is generally prohibited in Berkeley classes and in this one is grounds for failure. For our purposes, plagiarism consists of the unattributed use of another author's work, or the presentation of another author's work as one's own. A good rule of thumb is that if you think it might be plagiarism, it probably is. Thus all of the following count as plagiarism:

1. Directly quoting another person's actual words, whether oral or written, without citation (quotation marks and indication of source text).

2. Using another person's ideas, opinions, or theories, without citation (indication of source text).

3. Paraphrasing the words, ideas, opinions, or theories of others, whether oral or written, without citation.

If you are wondering if your paper, or parts of your paper, may be plagiarized, there are services available, such as EssayRater, that one can use to assess the occurrence of plagiarism in one's paper. Plagiarism.org is a good site for learning more about what constitutes plagiarism and how to avoid it.

Please keep all of this in mind as you work on your final papers. If you have any questions, feel free to check out one of the above sites or to e-mail me.

Best,

Ben

Blow-up Music

I'm wondering if anyone has found any significance in the music of Blow-up, I can't seem to connect it together.

Propeller scene in Blow-up

So, I re-watched Blow-Up yesterday (which by the way, I thought was not so interesting when I saw it the first time, but a FASCINATING movie when I watched slowly, carefully, and wow everything kinda makes sense now!) and why did the photographer buy the propeller? It appears completely useless.
In fact, why does he like buying stuff so much, like why did he want to buy that painting from Bill? And why does he want to buy that antique shop? Is it just to show that he's rich, or is there some other meaning behind that?

Jeff Joh

Citing A Room of One's Own?

What's the convention for citing quotes from the Virginia Woolf piece? There are no page numbers given, so do we just give chapter number or do we give page number based on the pdf' file's pages? Another question: There were a lot of typos in the pdf file, should we maintain the typos while quoting (using the sic marker and what not) or can we go ahead and correct obvious mistakes in the quote?

Thanks
Tom

Final Paper!

Hi Ben,
I wasn't sure if you said we had to use The Lover in our final paper or not?

Writing Analytically 7.2

From Katherine Su:

Writing Analytically, 7.2
1. Pros : The transition into the thesis statement is good, summing up the
two arguments being made in. Uses the word “despite” and “while” to set up
a typically good thesis structure. Presents the specific dilemma
accurately and concisely.

Cons: Makes no claim, nothing that needs to be further proved. Uses a lot
of nouns rather than verbs, no direction. Sums up the introductory
paragraph, doesn’t truly provide a compelling argument. It’s basically a
statement of fact. The first part of the sentence says “despite both
legitimate claims,…” however the second part is just reiterating the two
legitimate claims.

While both claims are legitimate, the issue of protecting the environment
will long outlive the problems of our current economy, but maintaining a
proper balance to both is key a successful future.

2. Pros: It makes a claim. Presents its argument clearly, introduces the
subject of the argument in the very beginning, uses “corporate view” to
try to seem like it is not a personal opinion.

Cons: It is, however, obviously a personal statement, based completely off
of the female stereotype in society. The beginning phrase is unnecessary
(“Regarding the….”), overall sentence is convoluted. “Losing the race”
isn’t quite the best phrase of choice.

As powerful firms promote people into top executive positions, gender
stereotypes are being used against women, claiming that a woman’s
compassion makes her less of a candidate.

Writing Analytically 7.2

1. This thesis makes no real claim about environmental or economic protection. It focuses on both as a whole, and just states that the issue “remains critical.” The thesis does not lead the paper in any particular direction, so nothing can really be resolved in writing the rest of the paper about why resolving the issue between environmental and economic protection is critical. The rest of the paragraph, however, sets up a definite contrast that can easily be debated.

Despite the concerns over preventing global warming, industries must expand to stimulate the American economy.

2. This thesis seems to have personal conviction in the claim. The claim puts women behind men in a corporate “race,” and assumes that executive positions require a lack of compassion. The thesis has a point, but is weakened in its wordiness and weak verbs. To "keep up" with competition is vague, and does not make a specific claim. Overall, the thesis seems more like an attack on women than an analysis.

Women are less likely to gain executive positions, because corporations believe that women are too compassionate to uphold the corporations' interests.

Writing Analytically, 7.2

1.
Strengths:
- anticipates objections by stating both sides and claims that they are both “legitimate”
- good sentence structure: starts out with “despite” and follows argument with “while”
- is relatively specific and avoids weak verbs

Weaknesses:
- somewhat wrong use of “despite”
- lacks drive: the use of “critical” remains ambiguous
- so what if it is “critical”?

Thesis rewrite:

Although protecting the environment and securing our country’s economic position are both legitimate claims, we need to intertwine both objectives because forsaking one for the other will result in useless efforts.

2.
Strengths:
- sets up argument well with points that readers will expect to find out about later

Weaknesses:
- awkward flow (especially the first sentence)
- wordy, non-specific words

Thesis rewrite:

Because most corporations consider women to be too compassionate to keep up with the competition within a firm, women are less likely to hold executive positions.

The Lover/Essay Question

Hey... So I am flipping through the Lover, and I recently noticed something that I hadn't seen previously:
p91
"It was as night ended that he killed himself, in the main square, glittering with light."

I seem to be missing something... who is dying here?

Please any help would be awesome!

-Zach

Writing Analytically 7.2

Question 1
1. The thesis states the obvious and has no compelling argument
2. "Critical" is too braod of a term
3. The thesis statement does not predicate
Although there exists these two established claims, the challenge of protecting the environment while simultaneously satisfying the economy remains the ultimate objective.

Question 2
1. There is a lot of weak verb use
2. There are a lot of generalizations such as "race"
3. The verbs are not strong enough to support the nouns and make for a strong statement
The corporate stereotype, in which women are viewed as too sensitive and compassionate to succeed in a competitive firm, hinders the number of women promoted into executive positions.